Does a Successful Marriage Come with a Guarantee?

As our loyal readers know, we have been researching successful marriage around the world for nearly three decades. In our travels throughout 47 countries in search of the best marriages we are often asked, “Are there ways to ensure that a marriage will succeed?” The answer is of course, “no.” Life, love, and marriage do not come with absolute guarantees. Marriage does not come with a warranty.

Let us hasten to add, however, you can greatly increase the odds that your marriage will last for a lifetime if your profile closely resembles the 15 predictors of a successful marriage discovered as a result of our 30 years of research in 47 countries.

The “15 predictors of a successful marriage” are:

1. It stands to reason that you and the one you love must first pass the Marriage Quiz. If you can’t get out of the starting gate with a successful marriage, the rest doesn’t matter. Take the Quiz and if you both receive a score of 18 or higher on the Marriage Quiz, you have met the first pre-requisite of a successful marriage.

2. Wait until you are at least 25+ to get married. Couples who get married after the age of 25 are far more likely to stay married than those who get married sooner. Experience and wisdom come with age.

3. Have an income-producing job with stability before you get married. Here’s what we know, couples with annual incomes over $50,000 (vs. under $25,000) experience a drastically reduced risk of divorce.

4. Do not have children in the first year of your marriage. Nora Ephron once said, “Having children is like throwing a hand grenade into a marriage!” Children are wonderful, but they bring stress and challenges to a marital relationship, especially to a new marriage. Bring children into the world when your marriage is ready for them.

5. Being spiritual and/or religious is good for your marriage. Couples that consider themselves religious or spiritual (vs. not) are considerably less likely to get divorced. Faith and spirituality contribute to the sense of oneness felt by successfully married couples – a necessary prerequisite to a long and happy marriage.

6. Focus on getting an education that includes post-secondary training. College educated couples have a much less chance of divorce than those with only a high school diploma. Education almost always leads to enlightenment and understanding and more tolerance for the views of others – so critically important in successful marriages.

7. Make sure your spouse is your best friend. When someone asks you who your best friend is, the honest answer must be, “My spouse.” There is no other acceptable answer to this question. Being in love is never enough without friendship.

8. Always fight fair in your marriage. All married couples argue—the difference is how they argue. Arguing is healthy for a marriage. Just fight fair and never make your arguments personal and hurtful!

9. Never lose your individual identity or subjugate your individual strengths just because you got married. While in many ways “two becomes one” in the best marriages, losing the sense of “who you are” hurts your marriage.

10. Never engage in acts of infidelity. While some marriages survive infidelity, the overwhelming majority do not. Think long and hard about what you will lose before you engage in infidelity – before you violate the most sacred of marital trusts.

11. Always allow time to be alone – for both you and your spouse. We have learned over the past three decades of research that every human being has a fundamental predisposition to be alone. Allow yourself time to be alone to your thoughts each day. Extending the same opportunity to your spouse will pay huge dividends for your marriage.

12. Talk about anything and everything! Marriages thrive on open communication and honest discussion. The most successfully married couples we have interviewed around the world tell us that they have learned to communicate frequently, fairly, openly, and honestly. Mum is not the word in marriages that work!

13. Always show mutual respect and admiration for each other. The best marriages repeatedly engage in acts of kindness towards each other with no expectation of something in return. They work hard to understand each other’s needs and wants. But remember – these behaviors take daily practice!

14. The greatest joy in life for both you and your spouse is spending time with each other. If you do not feel this way, you do NOT fit the profile of the most happily and successfully married couples we have interviewed around the world. There is no substitute for togetherness when it comes to a happily married couple.

15. Understand that all marriages go through seasons – much like the seasons of nature. Those marriages that last over time started with the simple planting of a seed. The seed was nourished over time. Love grown with tender and loving care matures into fully-grown love that can withstand the tests of time.

These predictors associated with the best marriages do not occur by accident or happenstance. Heed the advice and the odds are in your favor for a lifetime of marital happiness. Ignore the predictors and do so at your own peril. The choice is yours.

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter

Seven Warning Signs of Marriage Problems

During our many radio and television interviews over the years we are often asked this simple question – “How will I know my marriage is in trouble?’ Our research has identified the answer to this very important. Here are the Seven Telltale Signs Your Marriage Is In Trouble:

1. You fight and argue much more often than before and do so unfairly.

Fact is, you have nothing nice to say to or about each other anymore. You love to nitpick at each other. Your teasing isn’t fun – it is now painful and hurtful. You use each other as a personal pincushion!

Sadly, your arguments are repeatedly about the same subjects. You are increasingly critical of each other, you fight constantly, and you no longer fight fair.

As we have said many times before – it is okay to argue – all successfully married couples do – but the truth is this, successfully married couples have learned how to fight fair. Their arguments do not become personal and attack oriented.

2. One or both of you show increasing disrespect for each other.

In failing marriages, there are growing signs of disrespect. Resentment and contempt have replaced patience and love. You go out of your way to avoid being together.

And sadly, when you are away from your spouse you are happier than when you are with them. Having fun with your mate seems to be a thing of the past.

When mutual respect and understanding fail, your marriage is well on the way to its end. Make no mistake about that.

To see the other five warning signs that your marriage is in trouble, see the entire article: Seven Warning Signs Your Marriage Is In Trouble

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter

Myths and Truths About Marriage

Improving your chances for success can be as easy as understanding the difference between myths and truths about marriage. For example, it is a fact that if you get married before the age of 24 in the USA, you have a MUCH higher chance of getting divorced than those who get married at 25 and beyond. In fact, the divorce rate for those getting married after the age of 25 is only about 30% — less than half the 65% divorce rate for those getting married before the age of 24!

The facts about marriage reveal that people who get married older, who have higher education levels, who do not have children when they get married, and who marry someone of their general social class, have a much higher chance of marital success than those who do not meet these thresholds. In the end, what really matters are the ”truths” about marriage, not the mythologies about marriage.

Here are our Top Ten Myths about Marriage in America based on our nearly three decades of marriage research in 46 countries and on six of the world’s seven continents.

MYTH 1 – Married couples have sex lives that are less satisfying than those who are not married. REALITY – Not true! In fact, the research evidence supports the opposite conclusion– those who are married have far better sex lives and enjoy it more than those who are not married. There is no debate in reputable circles about this fact!

MYTH 2 – Cohabitation works as well as marriage. REALITY – Those who cohabitate are not as committed to their relationship as those who are married. In fact, those who cohabitate before marriage have a significantly higher divorce rate when married than those who have not cohabitated!

MYTH 3 – Married women have a higher risk of domestic violence in their marriage than unmarried women. REALITY – Simply not true!! In fact, women who are married have a far LESS chance of being abused than those who cohabitate without being married.

MYTH 4 – Marriage can survive infidelity. REALITY – While some marriages do in fact survive infidelity, the overwhelming majority do not. Think long and hard about what you will lose before you engage in infidelity.

MYTH 5 – The more educated a women is the less likely she is to get married. REALITY – There is no basis in fact for this mythology. In fact, college educated women are more likely to get married than their less educated counterparts.

MYTH 6 – Bringing children into a marriage strengthens the marriage. REALITY – Nora Ephron once said, “Having children is like throwing a hand grenade into a marriage!” Children are wonderful, but they bring stress and challenges to a marital relationship. Be prepared for the ups and downs!
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MYTH 7 – When you get married you lose your individual identity for the benefit of the oneness of your marriage. REALITY – Nothing could be further from the truth. In the best marriages neither spouse loses their individual identity or subjugates their individual strengths.

MYTH 8 – The one you are married to does not have to be your best friend. REALITY – Our three decades of research across cultures and continents reveals the opposite. In fact, the most successfully married couples report to us in our interviews with them that their best friend in life IS their spouse.

MYTH 9 – There are no particular advantages to being married. REALITY – In our own research and in the research of others, there are clear advantages and benefits to being married including living longer, being healthier, and accumulating more wealth. The health benefits accrue more to men and the financial benefits more to wives.

MYTH 10 – The most successfully married couples don’t argue. REALITY – Simply not true! In fact, all couples argue – those married successfully and those who are not. The difference is how they argue. The best marriages fight fair. If you decide to submerge your feelings, let the anger fester, and go to bed mad at each other – well, you are heading down a path that could ultimately lead to the destruction of your marriage. Arguing is healthy for a marriage. Just fight fair!

The truth of the matter is this – the best marriages survive and thrive – many for a lifetime. And those successful marriages know the differences between truth and mythology. They practice truth and ignore the myths.

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter

Is his love for me real?

Since time immemorial, the most important question of the day for women is this – Is his love for me real? The answer is simpler than you think. In the end, there are Seven Tests of True Love.

As our many readers know, we have been studying successful marriage and relationships for nearly three decades. And frankly, we get asked this question a lot. If you pay close attention to the following seven indicators, you will know the answer to this timeless question as well.

1. If you observe his actions rather than his words, what have you learned? Does he talk about how nice he is, yet kicks his dog? Does he tell you how much he loves you, but decides for you what you should eat, or the movie you should like on Saturday night?

Always remember this simple truism – he is what he does! Actions always speak louder than words! Ignore this notion at your peril.

2. Does he always treat you with respect or does he do so sparingly and inconsistently? People who are truly in love know this – treating the one you love with respect is a full time activity!

You cannot pick and choose the time and place to be kind, considerate, and respectful. He is either respectful full-time or he is not. It really is that simple. He is not entitled to pick and choose!

3. In your relationship, are you relegated to second-class citizenship or are you an equal partner? When someone really loves you, they treat you as an equal partner – as a person who has an equal voice in your relationship.

If he makes the significant decisions in your relationship and relegates you to following his directives, then he really does NOT love you. In the best loving relationships between a man and a woman, both share equally in the relationship.

4. When you are in love, you know this – you cannot imagine life without the one you love! So try this question on him – “Honey, do you love me more than life itself? Can you imagine life without me?” If his answer makes you wonder about the depth of his commitment to you, he doesn’t truly love you. He is not the man you should commit your life to!

5. People who truly love each other tell each so everyday of their lives together. Does he tell you he loves you? Does he do it without prodding? Does his love for you come naturally, repeatedly, and frequently?

The truth of the matter is this – when you love someone, you tell them. And don’t fall for that old line that goes like this – “I don’t need to tell her I love her because she knows.” This notion is just plain wrong! If he doesn’t tell you, then your relationship has a problem.

6. One of the underlying notions in the best relationships is this – “I trust him with my life and my sacred honor – I trust him more that life itself.” Your trust in him is unequivocal and without hesitation.

Here is the question of the day – Is the man you purport to love a man you trust without question? If the answer is no, then you need to reconsider the question, does he really love me?

7. In the end, if he really loves you, he is always there for you – through the good times and the bad. When somebody loves you, they love you through thick and thin. They love you without conditions. They love you when you are at your best and when you are at your worst.

When you are really in love, he makes you feel good. You are stronger because he is a part of your life. He makes you excited about where your relationship is going.

The measure of his love for you is always, in the end, about consistency. When you love someone, you cannot pick and choose the times you show you care, when you express love, and when you demonstrate your affection for the one you love. If his love for you is conditional, sporadic, and only comes when the times are good, you have to answer yourself this simple question – does he really and truly love me? You decide.

In the end, if he really loves you, he will meet the Seven Tests of True Love.

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter

How to Fight Fair in a Marriage

“Is fighting in a marriage alright?” This is the question we are often asked. The simple answer is, “Yes!” When a husband and wife fight, they are engaging in a perfectly normal and expected part of what it means to be married. In fact, disagreement between two people in love is actually healthy for their relationship. To argue or not argue is NOT the question! The question should be, “How do we fight fairly and effectively?”

Learning how to fight fair and to make appropriate compromises will go a long way towards keeping a relationship strong. Compromise is rarely ever 50/50. Some days it is 90/10; some days it is 60/40; and some days it really is 50/50.

The truth is, compromise is part of what marriage is all about. Whether it is what to make for dinner, where to live or what color to paint the living room, the two of you have to make the decisions together that both of you can support after the decision is made. Sometimes arguments can actually – pardon the pun – get to the heart of the matter.

Fighting and arguing are just as much a part of marriage as sex. It is a natural part of relating to another human being.

Over the years, our thousands of interviews with successfully married couples around the world have revealed seven ways to fight fair and they are:

1. Fight in a calm manner. That means don’t shout or throw things or rant about the situation. Don’t take a position of anger or hostility. Think about what you are going to say before it actually comes flowing out of your mouth.

2. No name-calling or ugly verbiage about your spouse. Don’t let the argument degrade into a battle of personal insults. It doesn’t address the issues and can do lasting damage to your relationship even. You can’t take back your words!

3. You are an adult, act like it. Don’t have a temper tantrum! Don’t just sit there looking mad without saying anything. Engage in the conversation with the thought of how can we solve this problem together as adults.

4. Keep the argument logical and focused on the issues at hand. Don’t wander off topic. Determine what the problem is, what issues need to be dealt with and what are the possible solutions. If you focus on determining which solution would work best, it keeps you moving towards an end result.

5. Don’t cast blame. It doesn’t matter who is right or wrong. It doesn’t matter whose fault it is. You share the problems together and you have to share the solutions together. What you discover is that when you can arrive at a solution by working as a team, the two of you can tackle anything that comes your way.

6. Don’t hold grudges. As soon as the issue has been resolved, forget it and move on. The worst thing you can do is resurrect old battles and scars. That means no gloating if you were right and no reminding him or her constantly about how mad you still are. Couples with great marriages tell us that they have a short memory when it comes time to their past arguments. That is the way it should be.

7. As we have said many times before, NEVER go to bed mad at each other. Settle your fight before you go to bed, no matter how long it takes. You can defer the ultimate decision on an issue until further discussion the next day, but you can’t go to bed mad at each other! This is the number one piece of advice given to us by the thousands of happily married couples that we have interview over the past 30 years around the world.

Remember, it is perfectly okay to argue and debate with your spouse. Better solutions are often arrived at when you engage in wholesome debate. Learning how to argue effectively is critically important to a healthy marriage and to a healthy relationship.

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter

Great Marriages Use Common Words and Phrases

We have been engaged in marriage research for nearly three decades around the world and have never been asked this question until our recent research trip to the Miami area – “Are there words or phrases you listen for when you interview the best marriages around the world?” This is a great question and we are delighted to share the answer with our thousands of loyal readers around the world.

The most successfully married couples (longevity plus measured happiness according to our marriage interview protocol) use specific words and phases as they talk about their relationship with each other.

Here are the words and phrases commonly used by happily married couples categorized into the seven pervasive characteristics of successful marriage from the 28 year study of marriage in 45 countries of the world:

1. Togetherness: In successful marriages, two become one in so many positive and important ways without losing their individual identities. The most important words and phases used by successfully married couples are: We, us, our, together, team, we are like one, we cannot imagine life without each other.

2. Truthfulness: In successful marriages, couples talk about anything and everything. There are no sacred cows – no secrets. In the best marriages you hear these words and phases: Confidant, complete trust, we never worry about betrayal, we know nearly everything about each other, we are the keepers of each other’s deepest and darkest secrets.

3. Respect: Successful love and marriage is about mutual love and respect. In the best marriages you hear these words and phrases: Mutual respect, admiration, kindness, politeness, we do nice things for each other with no expectation of something in return, we put each other’s needs first. Successfully married couples do all these things automatically.

4. Fitness: In successful marriages, to live until “death do us part” requires a mutual concern about good health. Here are the words and phrases they use: Health, fitness, exercise, vitamins, nutrition, salads, taking annual physical exams, take your medicine, we exercise together, we shop for food together!

5. Joint finances: In successful marriage, it is not YOUR money and MY money. It is OUR money. Here are the words and phrases they use: Our financial goals, our house, our bills, joint decision making, joint finances (no separate checking accounts), live within our means, we talk before we buy big items.

6. Tactile communication: In successful marriages, touching each other multiple times per day is the norm. Their mantra is, “I love you so much I must touch you.” They use these words and phrases: Warmth, caring, friendship, love, understanding, we love to hug, we have great sex, touching acknowledges your presence, our hands communicate loving messages, touching is our private Morse Code.

7. Surprise: Successful marriages are exciting, never boring, and full of unpredictable things. Boredom is not an option! The best marriages use words and phrases like: Variety, upending expectancies, fun, adventure, romance, passion, always finding something to do together, we never get bored with each other, we are each other’s best friends.

You see, the words and phrases you use tell a lot about your marriage. If you don’t hear these words and phrases in your marriage and relationship, it is clear you have some work to do. Get started today forming the habits that communicate love.

In love and marriage, simple words and phrases mean a lot!

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter

Infidelity: There are Liars and Cheats Amongst Us

Infidelity Kills a Marriage

In our recent blog post for www.PsychologyToday.com, discussing the infidelity of Arnold Schwarzenegger, we pointed out how our three-decades of research on successful marriage around world clearly supported this simple notion – infidelity in a marriage or relationship is rarely forgiven – infidelity is, for the most part, an unpardonable act.

The following three very important paragraphs were included in our post because, believe it or not, there are liars and cheats amongst us who believe that infidelity is forgivable and excusable. Some who wrote us even said it was “normal,” “encouraged” and “acceptable” in some parts of the world.

We responded to those who are morally bankrupt with the following three paragraphs:

“And to those doubting Thomas’s who believe that cheating on your spouse—engaging in acts of infidelity with the one you purport to love more than life itself—doesn’t matter, well, we have several questions for you.

Do you have someone in your life that you trust completely and unequivocally? Do you have a friend who trusts you back just the same? Is there someone in your life that you would lay down your life for? Is there someone in your life that would do the same for you?

If you answered yes to one or more of these questions, then ask yourself this one final question—if either my trustworthy friend or I violated the aforementioned trust before us, would I still say that infidelity is okay? If you say ‘yes’ then you are a person without principle—a person someone else cannot trust. Tell us infidelity doesn’t matter!”

Let’s take a further look at this notion by asking the following additional questions that we think will prove our point:

Ask yourself this question – “Do I have a best friend?” If the answer is “Yes” ask yourself this second question – “Would I ever betray my friend and consider such action an acceptable act?”

Or what about this? Have you ever completed a deal with a handshake, made a promise to someone you intended to keep, entered into a contract that you were morally and legally bound to uphold?

We would offer the following – if your answer is “yes” to any of the questions, then ask yourself this – why is a marriage you have entered into not worthy of the same consideration? Why would you tell someone you love them, make promises to them, enter into a contract with them, and then betray them by engaging in infidelity?

Be honest with yourself and with others. If you believe that infidelity with your spouse or lover is acceptable, then you also believe that a “handshake” doesn’t matter, that a commitment is just a bunch of meaningless words, that friends can be betrayed with impunity, and that a written contract is worth no more than the paper it is written on.

Those who wrote us and suggested that infidelity is AOK and acceptable – we say to you – you are a hypocrite! If you would violate the relationship you have with another person you purport to love, then you are guilty of betrayal. There are no if’s, and’s, and but’s, about it.

The bottom line is this – those who believe that lying, cheating, and engaging in acts of infidelity are okay is someone who is morally bankrupt. Such a person has a worthless handshake. And the truth is this – do not expect such a person to honor a commitment. One cannot cheat on a spouse and then rationalize that such an act is okay and that just because some do, it is acceptable.

Please, spare us the hypocrisy.

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter

How to Bullet Proof Your Marriage

Your marriage and relationship can survive if you just do the simple things that matter everyday. If you want to bullet proof your marriage here are the seven most important things you can do:

1. Nurture your relationship with each other first and foremost. The relationship between husband and wife trumps everything else in a marriage. Get it right and good things follow. Get it wrong and lots of bad things often happen!

2. Make a concerted effort to keep the flame of your love affair alive with each other everyday. Never let boredom take over your marriage.

3. Enhance your love relationship by providing each other occasional time for privacy and aloneness. Time alone is good for the soul; it nourishes the spirit.

4. Approach all challenges with teamwork and open communication. Never be judgmental, since passing judgment on an idea can often lead to the death of open and honest debate between two people.

5. Don’t blame each other when things get tough, as casting blame never solved a problem. Saying “It’s your fault” is a sure way to cause an unnecessary argument.

6. Don’t wallow in self-pity; it is a wasted emotion.

7. While love is simple to understand, people don’t always do the simple things necessary to make love last. Being IN love is easy, but making love last for a lifetime takes hard work. Successful marriage is an accumulation of having done the simple things each day.

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter

The “We” versus “Me” and “You” in great marriages

One of the key ingredients of a successful marriage is a feeling of togetherness – we are in this together and are stronger because of our relationship. While the importance of togetherness is easy to understand, for many couples it is difficult to put into practice in their relationship.

Happily married couples become one without losing the individual identities of each other. Their relationship is NOT focused on you and me, but rather it is all about WE!

Here are the three most important actions you can take to build togetherness as reported from our thousands of interviews with happily married couples:

1. Be the number one cheerleader for your spouse. Support your spouse in every way that you can. Let your partner know just how important they are to you and to the rest of the world. Perhaps the best help that you can give your spouse is to give them the confidence they need to become all that they can be in everything that they endeavor to do. Be your spouse’s strongest supporter. Become their cheerleader. Remember that when your spouse reaches the top of the mountain, you will be standing there with them.

2. Learn how to use comprise as part of daily living in your marriage. No one can have it all his or her way. We share the bed, the toothpaste, the car, the house, and the bills. While this sounds so simple, it can cause some unusual challenges as the two individuals in a marriage have to discuss and work out mutually agreeable arrangements for such minor issues as who uses the shower first and who takes out the trash, as well as major issues such as where to live, if children will be a part of the family, and what car to purchase. Discuss how the two of you will make decisions. When you share a marriage, you must learn the art of compromise—giving a little to gain a lot.

3. Carry the burdens of your marriage on four shoulders, not just two. Helpfulness should become such a matter of habit that you feel and act like a winning team. Both of you individually are good, but the two of you working together can be a dynamite team. The old saying that two heads are better than one is very true in a marriage. Ideas that the two of you generate can be better than most ideas generated alone. As you begin working together you will learn to sense when your spouse needs help, even when they do not ask for it. You will have a “sixth sense” that tells you when your spouse is in need. Sharing life’s burdens on four shoulders is certainly easier than on just two.

Successfully married couples report the importance they feel of always being able to count on their spouse for moral support when they are down in the dumps. This comes from the togetherness they have established in their everyday interactions with each other.

Seven Tips for the Best Holiday Ever

We have all seen it, the grandest of holiday plans come crashing down with the reality of the situation. Stress, stress, stress!!! Holidays are among the most stressful times in a relationship – make no mistake about it.

Here are a few tips to help you and your spouse lower your stress level and have the best holiday season ever:

1. Appreciate the traditions within your family and your spouse’s family. Blend them together in a way that both you and your spouse will cherish and make new memories together.

2. Money is not the solution to a great holiday season – especially in these tough economic times. Rather, it is the simple things that matter – simple acts of kindness, homemade gifts and cards, simple expressions of love.

3. Talk about what you are going to do for the season – what are you and your spouse’s highest priorities? Have this conversation as soon as possible so you both can feel good about your plans. Then, let all the other holiday “stuff” go by the wayside.

4. Take a moment in the midst of the chaos and pressure of the holidays to focus on what really matters. Give your spouse your respect, your understanding, your embrace, your kiss and your time.

5. When holiday problems arise – as they always do – an open discussion with your spouse needs to happen as soon as possible. Start by identifying what the issues really are, establish the parameters of the discussion and agree to solve the problems together.

6. As the stress rises, so does the opportunity for argument and disagreement. When the holiday tension rises sharp words can roll off your tongue, making judgmental statements about your spouse, their actions, and their relatives. Think twice before exploding with vitriolic words that cannot be taken back.

7. The holiday doesn’t have to be perfect! Invite the family and friends to share in the dinner preparation and holiday decorating. The relationships built are more important than holiday perfection.

Our final thought for the holidays is this – no love has blossomed or been sustained without doing the simple things.

Simple things do matter!

By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
For more marriage advice visit their website Simple Things Matter